Tuesday, March 15, 2005

So proud of MiMi Busuk... =)

Finally have the sense to write a bit after "rust-ing" for so many days.... Have some good news and of course bad news as well...

Let's start with the bad ones first. My parents have been nagging at me to give them money... That's very bad news to me, very very bad. Then came the realisation that next month I got no money!! And I have yet to complete my minimum flight hours!!! AAARRRGGGGHHHH!!!! SHIT SHIT SHIT!!!!

Then currently I'm on a week medical leave!!! Happy, but yet at the same time, my knee DOES hurt. Actually I have no idea what the Doc told me. Well, after this week of M.C., I still have another week!!! Heehee....

Well, the thing that really made me proud is not myself(DUH... When have I ever made myself proud???!!!). IT'S MIMI!!! H e got platoon best, silver "bay-yo-net". Hee... dunno how to spell. =) He also got platoon best when he was in BMTC. Now my MiMi is a sergeant!!!

We, (Actually it's I, but we went together!) just bought a pair of rings at Plaza Singapura on Sunday... But MiMi don't really seem happy 'bout the ringy though... I love the ring cause it's really chunky and it's a ring I bought for us!!! I'm not surw how exactly he feels 'bout the rings.. But well, I'm just going to view it as a ring I really love a lot!!!!

(Part 1) Going out now...But still want to blog... Part 2 coming up....

Thursday, March 03, 2005

MiMi coming back on Monday!

MiMi finally coming back on Monday!!! =)

Maybe I can finally feel loved again... Listening to Maroon5: She Will Be Loved. One of MiMi's favourite song before he was disconnected with the rest of the world.

We kind of had a small quarrel yesterday. I feel that he wasn't concern about me anymore. I felt so alone and cold. Guess I was tired 'cause I didn't have enough rest. He was asking me:" Other than me, are you been seeing other guys other than me for the past 2 weeks." Actually in fact I was pretty happy. This proves to me that he cares for me (or it is just a routine to messaged that??

He message me this morning:" NaNa must sms mimi. I say don't sms me when i got exercise. Now no more exercise Nana must sms mimi again. Morning." Was so touched....^_^

Gosh.... What am I exactly thinking these few days...???

I really longed for MiMi. .. ...

Tuesday, March 01, 2005

Friends and all...

How I miss my MiMi...

But you know what? In fact, I find that this is pretty good training for me in case we don't work out for the future.

Bike is out of surgery... Going to pick it up tomorrow. Me still only in Day 2 of recovery. By Thurs if things doesn't get better, I'll have to get more medical leave. *Yeay!!!!!!!!!!!!!!* But most probably I'll get better by then lar...

Reading so many blogs these few days, which includes me sleeping at only bout 3-4a.m. and waking up at those unearthly hours... I feel so much for so many things, but yet I can't comprehen my own feelings, thoughts and problems. What the hell right?? =)

I'm so confused and alone. I don't feel like sleeping cause there's no one to sleep with me, no one to keep me warm, no SMS to look forward when I'm up, no motivation to work, no one with me... The last time I cried was after the confrontation with the taxi driver. I really cried my heart out.

I was going thru some of my friends' friendster account. MiMi's friends' girlfriends seems so close. They seems to be such great friends even though they only know each other thru their boyfriends. I also know them thru my boyfriend. But how come I don't quite get along with them? Am I such an outcast in wherever I go?

They will still hang out without the boyfriends around. They will call and talk on the phone. They will ask each other out for clubbing. They talk to each other!! But I'm not "invited" and I really don't like this kind of feeling. It's really pulling me down each time they message me to ask if I want to join them last minute. I rather they don't message me at all.

It's not as if I never put in any effort to be "pally" with them. I message them if they want to go out for dinner. Well, if I'm lucky enough, 1 or 2 of them will reply. But most of the time, they don't even reply back and come up with any execuses.

I'm feeling pretty drained out to having cope with such interpersonal problems at work and with my personal life... Yet MiMi is not doing anything.

Does he know exactly how I feel? I really doubt so. He got more important things in his own life rather than to having to take care of mine. I doubt he still care about me at all.
=)