daddy?

i always envy others who have their dad by the arms, to march them down the aisle.

yet i do not want that.

i have a a dad. and i'm not close to him.
we have nothing to speak to, and we only communicate when there is a problem or when its a necessity to talk. he always brush me off even before i complete talking. he assume his own facts and give his "i have the final say" look. he always not at home and prefer to sweep everything under the carpet. in the end, there's nothing to tell him.

maybe dad is those who keep their love in the heart, but unfortunately he had done alot of things that prove otherwise. maybe i'm too immature to understand what's he doing or what he has done. maybe i just don't want to know him anymore. maybe i'll live to regret my decision.

i wonder why is it that i have a complete family nucleus, yet it's not a family. it does not have any family warmth at all.

this is a house, not a home.